Wednesday, January 9, 2013
Who We Hang Out With
I had two people last week ask me almost the exact same question. "Jeran, who do you hang out with?"
Who do I hang out with? What do you mean? I'm a mom.
But it did get me to thinking, about what I do outside of being home with Blanche every day. Really, I am pretty lucky, because even though Andrew and I don't have any family in town (besides my wonderful cousin) we do have lots of people that care about us here in Siloam. I still have many friends from college and others that Andrew and I have both made here in the community. I think I am just learning that life as a parent looks way different than when you were childless or single or in college. Even if all of your college friends still live in the same town.
I think this year (not really a resolution) I want to be more mindful of creative ways to keep connecting with people. When you have a child who's age is still stated in months, life is pretty busy. I guess life with kids is always busy, but the baby and toddler age seems to be a challenge for us in the night time routine. Blanche is a great baby but just takes more effort than some in getting her down each night. She really seems to be more like me and can be a night owl and sleep in late. Which is great until you want to hang out with anyone without a baby. But thats what I want to work on this year, helping Blanche in her nighttime routine, but also being flexible in spending evenings with friends.
Last weekend our good friend Joy asked us to come over for dinner and to make pizzelles. We had to say yes for two reasons:
1. We love Joy (the whole family really, baby Rosa and sister Sarah included)
2. Andrew is in love with pizzelles
A year or two ago, Andrew came home from work one day and told me excitedly that Joy had brought pizzelles to work. He told me that he had this Italian cookie in the fourth grade, loved it (because it tasted exactly like waffle cones) and had spent the rest of his life searching for the name and recipe of this cookie. He had been unsuccessful. Until one day Joy just brought them to work.
So this time it was a chance to learn how to make them. Which really was the completion of this childhood dream for Andrew. It was a great time. I have never eaten anything bad at Joy's house. She is such a good cook and hostess, even with a newborn. We all ate a wonderful dinner. Blanche kept saying "baby" and "hi, hi, hi" over and over to baby Rosa. There was also a little misunderstanding with Blanche finding Rosa's American Girl doll and playing with it and sitting in the doll's bed. All while I took pictures thinking it had been brought out with the other toys for Blanche. Turns out its being saved for Rosa until she's like seven and is a new family tradition or something. Oops. Blanche get off that doll bed. Put everything back. No harm done. Thankfully.
I think learning to confidently say both no and yes in the appropriate times is both a lifelong lesson, but also one that is so important when you have a family. Just having a full day of work and then dinner and cleaning up seems to take up so much of our day. I want to be happy and content just being with my family. But it is also so nice to say yes to times with friends. I do find it is easier to say yes to friends that have baby proof homes (chasing a toddler is very wearing) but luckily Andrew is a great cook so having people for dinner is always an option.
I told myself I wasn't going to do to two things over the New Year on my blog:
1. Write a reflective 2012 post
2. Write a "goals" for 2013 post
But I sort of feel like this post sort of did that. Maybe its natural to reflect and set goals. I don't know. All I know is that friendships change and mold into different things, but I want to try and be intentional about the relationships that I do have. And now even though its January 9th, I'm hearing Auld Lang Syne and thinking about my favorite New Years Eve movie: